new.favourite.tumblr

http://myfriendsaremarried.tumblr.com/post/38227300785/when-my-friend-tells-me-she-wants-to-set-me-up-on-a

--look at be amazed
--and laugh hysterically

letter.

Dear You,

     I want to tell you so badly. I want you to want me. I want you to want to listen to what I have to say. I want you to care. I want you to tell me all your silly opinions, and teach me how to play that dumb video game and all about what your learning at school and reading and doing at work. I want you to want to be my friend.  I want you not to just look through me. I want you to care, just a little bit. Please?

      I love your smile. I love your laugh. I love your beautiful blue eyes. I love the way you glance at me in the rearview mirror.  I love the way you stop in the middle of a sentence. I love the way you noticed me when I felt so lost and helpless. I love the way you love dressing up. I love the way you are passionate about the things you love. I love the way you pretend to know it all. I love the way you work hard. I love the way you help me. I love the way your compliment me. I love the way you make me feel. I love that we love the same shows. I love that you listen to me. I love that you respect me. I love the way you love The Lord with all your might and strength. I love the way you're unafraid to share your testimony, to make sacrafice and to reach out. I love the way you try with my little sister and understand how awkward I feel sometimes. I love so many things about you, but then I hate you. I hate you because I KNOW you don't care.

     When we have it, we have it. When we don't we don't. I don't know how to find a happy medium with you. I don't know how to stop. I don't know how to be your friend, or anything else for that matter.

   But I know this will never happen. I know I shouldn't worry. I know that what you are to me, is an illusion. It's not real. It isn't real because you won't give me a chance. You won't let me in. You're not real. I like so much about you, but none of it is real. This should be easy. But it's not.

   You're everywhere. Everything I do ends up revolving around you somehow. It's driving me crazy.

     Please let me go.

     Please tell me how.
       
     You're the one destroying me. You're the only one who can save me.

Love, (and yes, I think love)
Me